I've gone for college......I hope to go to Jannah.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Im trying to stay innocent but how can i?

i am writing this out of great frustration

first of all, Assalamu alaikum wa rhamatu Allah

im not supposed to know about all the aspects of marriage or why boys like girls or why girls wear makeup outside even though they dont touch it at home (or maybe they do if the window is open). im not supposed to know about the bad stuff a guy can do to a girl (and woman) who is walking home alone. i shouldnt know any bad words and i should not be peer pressured to show my body and laugh in that high-pitched way and shake my hips in the street and smoke and deal with drugs and laugh when a person near me burps (or even worse) and
and
and
and
and
now i have to go because we are invited somewhere at 7 (lol, maybe in an hour we will get there) but i know that on the way, i will be thinking about how i could have been innocent, but i didnt get to enjoy innocence for a long time because....
i live in America.

8 comments:

  1. You can fight it sister. Just be strong and recite the Quran in your heart. :)

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  2. wa aleikom al salam wr wb

    yeah, good point. when i was in Portugal, it was pretty hard for me telling people all the time "i don't do that, it's bad according to my religion" and even when they knew the reason why i don't do a certain thing, they would still talk about the same thing over and over again and even sometimes force me to do something, which obviously had some consequence to them (by me becoming really mad and sometimes even distance myself from them forever).

    if you don't have any other choice but to stay in a non-Muslim country, may Allah help you.

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  3. I wanted to thank you Sara for giving me really nice advice. it never occured to me that the Quran can be recited in one's heart. And Saifyah, I have no idea which country you live in, but the sad thing is, some Muslim countries can have the same problem. Some, just some, but thats some too many.

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  4. Boniourkee, unfortunately i do not speak your language and there fore cannot understand what you are trying to say. I'm glad you are expressing yourself, though. Always remember that we may not speak the same tongue, but EVERYONE SMILES IN THE SAME LANGUAGE!

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  5. How about thinking it this way? That by knowing these stuff, you try to avoid doing the bad. You try to learn from the wrong others are doing. Instead of putting make-up when you go out, you can try covering yourself and avoid nonmehrams getting attracted to you. Instead of cursing, you can try to talk in kind words, and try to save yourself from these bad words. Inshallah, the harder it is for you, the more reward you are going to get by saving yourself from it. You may slip at times, but you got to try your best, and never quit, and inshallah one day you will succeed. Keep praying to Allah! Anddd,, if someone is peer pressuring you to do bad, then you shouldn't be friends with them. Friends are a big influence. Xo. =)

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  6. muslimah: Did you ever wish you were completely and totally naive? Well, i woudnt want that, but sometimes i wish i was. for the most part you are right. And also, about the friends thing, ill totally keep an eye on things.

    with love,
    a slave

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  7. you mean innocent? yeahhh!! but with knowledge, you learn what's good and what is bad. what you should save yourself from. and what you should try to achieve. =) friends are really a big influence! you should really be careful on picking the right kind of friends! Xo. =)

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  8. i totally agree. its like my mind talking through you.

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